Expecting is the greatest impediment to living. In anticipation of tomorrow, it loses today”.
Lucius Annaeus Seneca
Yesterday I rushed to the grocery store to stock up on essentials,
Then quickly home so I could batten down the hatches and hunker down to wait out the big, bad, ominous blizzard that, according to the weather channel’s red written warning, was
(insert “Death March” music here)
10-20 cm of snow in less than 24 hours.
So I waited.
And watched in anticipation from my living room window.
Then finally, a flake showed up.
And …..that was about it.
And I have to admit I was a little disappointed. Not that I wanted more snow but the drama of it all was mildly distracting from the monotony of my day.
Isn’t it interesting how we can build up something as simple as a February snow fall and be disappointed when it doesn’t manifest itself the way you expected it to.
Kinda like other things in life. Like high school graduation day. The hoopla, the buildup, the dress and when the day arrives…
Now don’t get me wrong. It was certainly an “occasion”. But looking back I can honestly say that sitting on the old patio chair in our front yard the next afternoon, thinking “now what?” and “life is REALLY going to change now”, sent far more chills of excitement down my spine than parading around in a grad gown and having my name called to receive a certificate.
And then there was my 18th birthday. Similar to my 17th birthday only with vodka and orange juice. No blinding light. No great epiphany. No finally feeling like an adult. But the talk and the build up towards the big I-8 was more exciting than the day itself.
How about you? How often has the anticipation of something been more monumental than the event itself?
Interesting how these, as well as the others that immediately come to mind, all seem to have occurred when I was “younger”. Ok, dramatically YOUNGER. Nowadays, for the most part, I try to live as Seneca says and take each occasion as it comes. I try hard not to dramatize even the most exciting of moments,
they are what that are.
Nothing more, nothing less.
Living in the moment as opposed to living for “what may be.”
Unless, of course, we’re talking about impromptu blizzards.